As I sat at my son’s baseball game tonight, my phone going off with alerts of the most recent school shooting out of Texas, my broken heart broke again and again, for parents that will not be attending little league games, and for children that will not be playing.
And I am angry. And I am sad. For all our students that face this reality. This terrible reality of lockdown drills, violence, apathy, and death.
I sat and I watched these boys play with their whole hearts a game that their dads and uncles played too. I watched their innocence, and their joy. I cheered when they caught the ball and held my breath when they struck out. And I wondered what madness exists that we have not created a world in which we can keep them safe?
I just kept watching those boys on the baseball field. I couldn’t tell you the score and I certainly don’t know their record. But I do know they are the lucky ones. The ones with at least one positive adult role model. And I question and worry how we create that for every student.
I have spent my entire adult career working with children and families in trauma. And I say to you clearly – we are a world in trauma. The bandaids that we have been putting over gaping wounds are not working. Our children need more. Our children deserve more.
Our teachers and our school staff will return to work tomorrow morning, full of this same horror, anger, and sadness, to face classes full of children, without the answers and support that they need. But tomorrow isn’t here yet. For tonight, I will sit with my grief. I will sit with the gratitude I feel for coaches and teachers that create safety, kindness, and respect. Tonight I will pray.
Tomorrow is for advocacy and policy and change.
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