Let me let you in on a little secret. I was once a middle school student. Cue shocked faces.
As a matter of fact I was a middle school student at the very same middle school where I now work as a counselor. There are some benefits to working where you were once a student. Like easy access to 8th grade yearbook photos. When this is all over, and we can return to our school buildings, remind me, and I can post some really awesome mid nineties photos of my middle school days. I had a bob haircut that was supposed to be cute, but really was just a giant triangle on my head. Middle school is fun.
The other advantage of being the same place now, as I was so many years ago, is being reminded of the life lessons that come with age and experience. Much to all of our relief, you cannot go back and relive middle or high school but you can take the experience, you can learn and you can grow.
When I was in high school I was on the Cross Country Team and I was slow. I mean like really, really, really really SLOW. I never won a race, as a matter of fact, I usually came in dead last. I had an incredible coach and inspiring teammate and not once did I ever feel like a loser. All those races, that I never won, I also never quit and in that I accomplished a great deal. Running is the one sport that it doesn't matter what other people do, it matters what you do. You can literally run against yourself. So while I might have been losing to the other runners I was consistently beating my last best time. Progress, not perfection. All those miles and races on the cross country team taught me lessons that have lasted my whole life.
Lesson One: Pace Yourself
Life is not a sprint, it is a marathon and you need to act accordingly. There is no prize for being the first one done. (Well, I guess there is a medal for coming in first in running, I wouldn't know, like I said I was slow) You cannot rush things. You cannot run three miles in the time it would take you to sprint across a football field. You cannot eat healthy for a day and drop ten pounds. You cannot take one piano lesson and play Beethoven. But that does not mean that you cannot accomplish those things. There is no dream to big for you. You can accomplish absolutely anything you set your mind to. The key is to set a goal and then make steady progress towards its completion. Pace yourself. If you do one thing every day, by the end of the week you will be five days closer to where you want to be.
Lesson Two: Stay in Your Lane
Comparison is the thief of joy. If you want to be happy, if you want to be successful, you cannot compare yourself to other people. Repeat after me: They are not you.
They are not you. They do not have your unique gifts and talents. They do not have the same challenges and struggles. They are not living your life. You are the only meter of your success. You know what is a strong and steady effort for yourself. You know where you can push yourself a little harder and you know when you need to slow down and give yourself grace. Stop comparing, stop staring, stay in your lane, and match your own best effort. When you look at other people you are only seeing what is on the outside, you are only seeing the end product. You don't see the behind the scenes work or the behind the scenes help that went into making it all happen. Run a little bit farther today than you did yesterday.
Lesson Three: Don't Forget to Enjoy the Scenery
The great thing about running is that it can be done anywhere, on a treadmill, a track, down the sidewalk, or through the woods. My favorite thing about cross country courses is how they are never a straight line. They go up and down hills, you run forward for awhile, then wrap back around before getting to the finish line. Progress is like that. Success is not merely a destination and it is rarely a straight line from start to finish. For every step you take forward, there are sometimes two that you take back. Hills are never fun to run up, but the views from the top are always the best. If you become too focused on the end of your race, you will miss all the good parts. Keep your eyes open and look around. See the joy that is happening all around you while you get to where you are going. Don't be so focused on the end that you forget to live every single part.
So take a moment today, to breathe, to enjoy the place that you are, and to acknowledge your own great work and effort. You are amazing. That dream you are dreaming is possible, with tiny steps every day.
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